Friday, April 4, 2008

Tainting the Game

"God Bless America, land that I love. Stand beside her, and guide her duh duduh, duh duduh, duh duduh! Stand beside her, and guide her, do duhdoo, do duhdoo, do duhdoo!"

Why do we sing this song at baseball games?

For whatever reason, during the seventh inning of every baseball game since 9/11/2001, some fire chief or random American Idol reject gets on the mic in every ball park from Seattle to Miami (not sure about Canada yet), and sings one of the oddest choices of "Hooray America" songs ever. I don't know, I may have heard it once in Kindergarten, or played it on one of those little plastic flutes during music hour in 3rd grade.
Seriously, the song's a little childish, and almost feels like were patronizing ourselves when the P.A. announcer makes everyone stand up in his serious voice to hear some obese opera singer tenor, belt out the words to the song with the bouncy-ball sing-a-long on the jumbotron at baseball games.

The truth is, no one knows the words, we already sang the National Anthem, 24% of the players are foreign-born and this whole uber-nationalistic propaganda feels too painfully forced to even be taken seriously.

And honestly, what is more American than "Take Me Out to the Ballgame"?

Effective immediately, I have begun a silent protest of the singing of "God Bless America". While everyone stands like sheep, I will sit in protest, and I ask you to find the reason and the courage to join me.

5 comments:

pob said...

I was at the horse track yesterday and all of a sudden I look around and everyone is stopped dead in their tracks, completely silent, and all staring at a television screen. It was really odd looking and at first I didn't know what was going on because from where I was walking I couldn't hear any of the speakers. I keep on walking towards where I was going and then heard the National Anthem and decided that I didn't really give a shit and just kept on walking. I was with a Canadian (a real one) so I able to justify all the bad looks with that.

Point is, I don't give a shit about the National Anthem anymore. Also I don't think I've ever heard the song you are referring to.

Big Deal said...

Im not going to go on a huge rant but I think its sufficient to say America is not the only nation that publicly feels God is on its side.
Pro athletes are a particularly religious bunch (my guess is at some point of their life the question pops up about why they are so much more gifted then the average person and their rational is God).
So the argument that non national players are being subjected to having to hear about God when they would rather not doesn't hold a bunch of weight with me.
Plus baseball is America’s pastime, no there is no need to argue about how much better football does in the ratings, yada yada yada.
In conclusion I would recommend a similar action as I take when I hear, “God Bless America” sung in the middle of the seventh. Take the opportunity of all those people standing up to go get another beer before the cut you off after the bottom of the 7th inning is over.

pob said...

and now you owe me a drink... I think that makes 2

Unknown said...

where's my free drink

tommy o said...

free drink! that's 2 for me, too.